ginger steps.

got back all my promos papers. did freaking badly.

maths: A. the paper's so easy i could have easily gotten above 90 but i didn't. careless, complacent, whatever you call it.

chem: B. more than half of the cohort got A and i missed it by a freaking 2 marks, MORE THAN HALF OF THE COHORT GOT A.

bio: D. an improvement is no longer an improvement when everyone improves and all others improve more than you do.

econ: D. i thought i did so well for essay 2, i prepared so much for that topic and mr vadi gave so much guidance and i wrote a freaking 5-page long script for it and everything, and i still failed it.

h1 physics: B. i was so confident that i was bragging to dad and mum and wanqing and johnny and i forgot how many other people that this is an A already in my pocket safe and secure when i saw my marks i almost wanted to cry. missed the A by another freaking 2 marks.

gp: C. i failed my content for the essay and i thought i wrote it long and well-structured and sophisticated and blah blah. hohum.

so you see, basically this is my worst worst worst exam ever cos i did badly for ALL subjects. ALL SUBJECTS. at least last time when i didn't do well for any exam it was still only regarding a few of the subjects. last year when i did badly for prelims i almost drowned myself at home in tears of depression, and eventually moderation still helped me get back my 6 points. and look at me now. there's no moderation to help me and i did freaking badly for ALL subjects and i don't even feel any disappointment with myself, or maybe i do but only a tinge of it.

dad and mum scolded me really badly yesterday. it was actually more like a lecture but at the age of 17 a lecture is as bad as scolding.

freaking upset.