ginger steps.

last year the earthquake occured on the 4th day after i reached china. of course i was too far away from sichuan to feel any tremor, but the trauma was equally immense. for one entire week, the tv was doing round the clock live report. during that week i spent a lot of time at my grandparents' house, during which i spent a lot of time in front of the tv. and i had to take breaks in between cos after watching for a while, i would feel very mentally exhausted. it was days of puffy teary eyes, during which i watched about a 12-year-old girl who amputated herself to save herself from a falling pillar, a mum who typed her baby an sms in the last minute of her life, a 3-year-old boy who saluted the soldiers after being rescued, a policeman who managed to save many many children but had to witness the death of his own son, etc. then there was the charity show on 18may night. another round of crying session. when the charity show ended at midnight, i turned 19. before that i've been pondering for months whether i should go overseas for studies. and then at that moment i turned to mum and told her, i'm not go anywhere else, i just want to be beside her and dad.

but of course later on when i was less overwhelmed with all those emotions and more rational, i spent another month making up my mind, haha. things are always like that. for one moment you're full of emotions and it feels like you've discovered new meanings to life and suddenly everything seems clear to you. and for the next moment all the emotions die down and you go back to what you deem normal, sometimes you even detest yourself for having redundant emotions. but actually, i believe, the lessons learnt will continue to stick to us, somehow.

and, i believe the survivors will continue to display optimism for the rest of their life, though that takes courage beyond imagination. and for us, i guess the least we can do is to learn from them and treasure life and the people around us more.(: